Death, despite being one of the few guarantees in life, is little spoken about. It seems odd that the opening chapter of our life has a phenomenally popular show dedicated to it in One Born Every Minute, yet the equally important closing one doesn’t. Distaste, perhaps? Maybe, yet I can’t help feeling this is a little unfair.

One-off documentary Flashy Funerals was a step towards redressing this imbalance. It focussed around three funerals that were all a little extreme. Nathan’s saw thousands being spent on flowers and every corner of his life turned into a memorial. Fona’s (apology for any misspelling) featured a Lamborghini, a Shetland pony and a double-decker bus, the latter because he stole one once with passengers still on it. Sharon’s funeral featured a DJ and disco.

On the surface then, it was easy to mock the deceased’s families trying to create the perfect memorial. Certainly, the documentary played a clever ruse on the viewer, showing them the more eccentric items on the list of requests. I admit to laughing at the floral tribute to Nathan’s electrical toothbrush and some of the more ornate caskets in the showroom.

But then it hit you with a punch as the stories of the deceased unfurled themselves. Nathan had died in his early 20’s from muscular dystrophy. Sharon had been parlaysed for the best part of the last three decades after a mystery illness. Fona hadn’t had a family Christmas in years and had never married or had children. Life had been exceptionally cruel to them and this was their families’ way of rectifying some of the pain they had suffered. I went from laughing to welling up with tears at Nathan’s funeral. Suddenly, nothing that family did for him, or what any of the families featured were doing, seemed so ludicrous.

The star for me though was undertaker Matthew. I could watch a whole series of him putting together funerals like we saw on this show. He was kind, hardworking and determined. He knew he had a duty to do right by his clients and did so. He also offered, for me at least, the most searing insight into why we sometimes go to the lengths we do when we are saying goodbye to a loved one – “the funeral isn’t for the person who has died, it is for the ones they leave behind”. I can’t help feeling a show like this could make the whole process of grieving much easier to deal with.

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